Hmmm....

I just want to know? Do things ever really get better and easier?
When do you know what your supposed to do with your life?
When do you know someone actually really cares about you?
When someone says I love you..do they really mean it?
Will life ever stop being boring...?
It just feels meaningless sometimes...life that is.
I know its not, but its just that I feel like I do the same old thing every day.
Isn't there more to life than this?
Where is the excitement?
I hate feeling alone...I'm surrounded by friends and I have a family that loves me and I seek God all the time yet I feel terribly alone.I feel like I always somehow let my friends down or annoy them...and it seems like nobody ever wants to do something different or exciting.I want to meet someone that will do exciting things with me.....like hike up a mountain, who will have a picnic with me in the park, who will build snow forts with me, who will make home videos with me..the list goes on.
I want him to make me laugh all the time, and hold me when I cry.
Where is this man?
Does he even exist?

I want someone to say that they are a better person because they knew me.
I want to change peoples lives.
I want be somebody to remember.
I want to make some kind of difference in this world.
I want to make people laugh all the time.I want to be in a band and play guitar.
I want to change.... but where do I start?

I'm sick of college, and I'm sick of home(even though I haven't been there in 2 months).I don't want to work next year..I want to go to another school...but where?
Where do I go?
What do I do?
I have no idea what direction to take next in life....and its so frusterating!